Russian Hospitality - You Were Invited to Be a Guest at a Russian Home

When you visit your friends, relatives,take this polite answer literally in Russia. It is our
fiancée or business partner in Russia mostcustom not to come empty-handed and common
likely you will be invited to come to their home.to bring flowers for the lady of the house, the
With this invitation there come expectations. Whathostess of the event. Make certain that the
will the invitation be like? What do the hostsflowers have an odd number and of the fresh-cut
expect and what are your assumed obligations?variety (an even number of flowers or artificial
Insights into this aspect of social interaction inflowers are only brought to a funeral). Should a
Russia are what I wish to share with you today.guest arrive without any flowers, expect to hear
As you might imagine, one usually does notthe usual excuses, including, "I did not have
receive a written invitation unless it is a weddingenough time" or "I was unable to find the ones
or an important widely celebrated anniversary. Ityou like." While some behaviors differ, others are
is quite common to invite guests during a casualuniversal!
encounter or with a simple phone call. Often one isIt is also common to bring something for the
not afforded much advanced warning, generallytable to share, such as a cake, pastry or sweets
2-3 days before the actual event. Don't expect tofor tea time, which always comes after the main
be invited for lunch or dinner; you are invited tomeal. You would also be well served to bring along
come as a guest. Sounds confusing? Let me help.some alcohol for the host to stay in good graces!
It is unusual for a Russian to invite somebodyIf you know what it is they drink at home, buy it.
over for tea or coffee only. Even though RussiansOtherwise wine always works. If you seek yet
do not always specify what kind of meal will beanother option, try fresh fruit.
served, most likely you will have a time specifiedIt is preferable to come on time. If there are
for arrival, be it 6-7 p.m. or even 2-3 p.m..many guests coming, and one is late, it'll force
Whatever the time, expect that the menu andothers to wait and will put you in an
courses for the meal will stay the same: a largeuncomfortable position upon late arrival.
variety of salads, meat cuts and mushroomsWhatever you decide to bring, just be friendly
followed by the main course and, as always, teaand genuine like you would be with guests in your
afterwards.own home and enjoy the Russian hospitality that
Most will ask, "What could I bring along?" Inis famous the world over. There is no restaurant,
response, one is likely to hear, "Nothing, justeven the most luxurious, which can match a
come yourself." While this might seem quite ahome cooked feast prepared with love and the
common conversation here in the USA, do notcamaraderie shared with family and friends.