| "I do!" were the words that both my husband and | | | | of the man you married) |
| I confirmed to each other face to face the day | | | | 2. Heal-Cry, look at photos, renew your hope for |
| of our blessed wedding day about 2 and half | | | | the future by keeping pictures of great memories |
| years ago. My mind was racing with wonderful | | | | around every room around the house, yes even |
| thoughts about how much I loved him and how | | | | the bathroom! |
| happy I was to be committed to him as now his | | | | 3. Keep him in the loop-share daily events, funny |
| wife. Finally, we will live happily together in our | | | | experiences with family and friends at work, |
| new home we bought and begin to create | | | | share when others mention positive things about |
| memories to share back with our future children. | | | | him. Write letters at least twice a week (how |
| Our marital experiences were great until the | | | | exciting to get love letters), talk daily over the |
| prison system intervened 2 months later in our | | | | phone and be sure to include him in making |
| marriage. | | | | decisions at home, send books and magazines of |
| We married late September 2007 and now he | | | | his interest, read the same books, use words of |
| was gone to prison 2 months after... December of | | | | affirmation like (I am so happy to be your |
| the same year-2007! My first married Christmas | | | | wife....your voice brings me peace...), value his role |
| without him already. It was all but a blurry | | | | as a husband at ALL times. |
| experience that happened so fast so quickly and | | | | 4. Connect with your spiritual side-Unexplainable |
| now he was gone for 8 years according to the | | | | peace, strength, empowerment occurs that helps |
| prison system for a conspiracy crime. What? | | | | transform your lonely days into grateful and |
| Murderers do less time, child abuse felons do less | | | | hopeful ones. Join a church where you may share |
| time... how was this possible? All of the confusion | | | | your sorrow and experiences of a Prisoners wife |
| and misunderstanding was all part of the grieving | | | | without feeling judged this will give you a sense of |
| process wives with husbands in prison experience. | | | | relief. Read biblical verses daily and connect with |
| Little did I know I would be in that percentage. I | | | | your inner soul to give you powerful strength that |
| know that there are many wives going through | | | | help you cope for the absence of your husband. |
| similar experiences as I do and we are definitely | | | | 5. Keep busy! Do the things you always wanted |
| not alone with over 2.3 million people currently in | | | | to do, but you didn't have time for when he was |
| the nation's prisons or jails too many wives are | | | | here. Like go to back to school, learn a new skill |
| left alone doing "time" at home without a survival | | | | (ceramics, gardening, scrapbooking...). Go out with |
| kit. How does a faithful wife cope for months and | | | | friends for dinners, spend time with family or |
| years without the "head" of the family? | | | | involve yourself at work with more projects. |
| Through my own experiences I have developed a | | | | It hasn't been easy and I sympathize with all |
| survival kit for myself I'd like to share with other | | | | wives whose husband's are apart from them. Yet, |
| wives making it day by day...waiting for that | | | | I have learned to maintain focus on all the positive |
| phone call..and looking forward for the next "visit" | | | | experiences as a prisoner's wife. Family, friends |
| you know what I mean. The special times spent | | | | and co-workers who know about our situation or |
| talking about everything you can to connect and | | | | don't know have expressed that I look so happily |
| keep your marriage strong and going. Well, over | | | | married and that my husband seems like a |
| the past 2 and a half years my husband has been | | | | wonderful person. Well, he is and I am happily |
| in prison, I have survived my "time" at home by | | | | married because my communication is stronger, |
| using these 5 tips I call my survival kit. I can say | | | | my perspective towards marriage is different, my |
| that I am less stressful and more balanced than | | | | role as a Prisoner's wife has helped me to value |
| many wives that DO have their husbands home | | | | both small and big things between every moment |
| with them? Strange right? Try them for yourself | | | | my husband and I share. I smile when I see his |
| and understand my feelings of "it's going to be | | | | pictures and think "this is temporary" we are both |
| okay" here you go: | | | | healthy, have the privilege to see each other, talk |
| 1. Stay Positive-Reflect on why you married your | | | | daily and write and connect like we never did |
| husband to help you think of the qualities you love | | | | before. We have learned to appreciate each other |
| about him to help reassure your commitment to | | | | and not take our marriage or our presence for |
| him. Share his great qualities whenever you can, | | | | granted-who can beat that feeling! God Bless you |
| with friends, family and co-workers that know | | | | all and you are all in my daily prayers... keep the |
| him (this helps you smile and keep feeling proud | | | | strength, faith and hope! |