| Kids who order their parents lack the | | | | Second Social Skill Tip for Handling Bossy |
| necessary experience to be generals. Inside | | | | Kids: If you hold family meetings, discuss |
| you'll find 3 parenting tips for decreasing | | | | your son's behavior as a family problem to |
| bossiness at home, increasing social skills, | | | | solve. Role-play with him on how to ask for |
| and building character too. Parenting Advice | | | | things. Get him to make a commitment to ask |
| - A Social Skills Quote: "Conversation isn't | | | | with respect. Have him write his commitment |
| just crossfire where you shoot and get shot | | | | and sign it. Then post it on the refrigerator |
| at! Where you've got to duck for your life | | | | as a reminder. Third Social Skill Tip for |
| and aim to kill! Words aren't only bombs and | | | | Handling Bossy Kids: Think about using the |
| bullets -- no, they're little gifts, | | | | Feedback Formula when your son orders you to |
| containing meanings!" - Philip Roth If you | | | | do his bidding. It's simple and goes like |
| have a demanding child, his words may feel | | | | this: When you - I feel - I would like you to |
| like bullets. Let's find out how to change | | | | - Let's fill it in: When you order me to do |
| them into little gifts with meanings. This | | | | something, I feel disrespected and won't get |
| Social Skill Problem Comes from Bruce: "My 11 | | | | what you want. I would like you to say, |
| year-old-son need's to ask for what he wants | | | | "Please" with respect or get it yourself. |
| with respect. It is automatic for him to say, | | | | This formula could help your son realize the |
| "Dad, get me some milk." After such a | | | | tone of his words affect both you and others. |
| command, conversations like the following | | | | If his bossiness doesn't work at home, it |
| takes place: Dad - Sorry can't do it. Son - | | | | won't work at school or with friends either. |
| Why? Dad - Because you have not asked for it | | | | Thank you, Bruce, for sharing this social |
| properly. Son - (begrudgingly) May I please | | | | skills problem. May it help other parents who |
| have some milk. It happens over and over | | | | face bossy kids. Social Skills Summary: |
| again." Parenting Advice - An Important | | | | Consider using one or a combination of these |
| Principle: Use the least amount of discipline | | | | social skill tips. The ease of the "parenting |
| to handle the problem. I like Bruce's | | | | stare," the family meeting, and the feedback |
| approach. I can even hear his respectful tone | | | | formula make them valuable parenting tips. |
| as he corrects his son. Unfortunately, it's | | | | The trick is to use them consistently and |
| not quite enough to handle the problem. First | | | | never accept disrespect. Why not teach your |
| Social Skill Tip for Handling Bossy Kids: | | | | little general to change his demanding |
| Pretend you are Bruce. Consider using the | | | | bullets into little gifts of respect. Respect |
| "parenting stare" while saying and doing | | | | is a basic social skill to learn at home, in |
| nothing. Make sure it's serious but not mean. | | | | school, and with friends. Respect builds |
| Stare at your son for several seconds then | | | | character too. |
| turn away without getting what he wants. | | | | |