| Kids who order their parents lack the necessary | | | | Social Skill Tip for Handling Bossy Kids: If you hold |
| experience to be generals. Inside you'll find 3 | | | | family meetings, discuss your son's behavior as a |
| parenting tips for decreasing bossiness at home, | | | | family problem to solve. Role-play with him on |
| increasing social skills, and building character too. | | | | how to ask for things. Get him to make a |
| Parenting Advice - A Social Skills Quote: | | | | commitment to ask with respect. Have him write |
| "Conversation isn't just crossfire where you shoot | | | | his commitment and sign it. Then post it on the |
| and get shot at! Where you've got to duck for | | | | refrigerator as a reminder. Third Social Skill Tip for |
| your life and aim to kill! Words aren't only bombs | | | | Handling Bossy Kids: Think about using the |
| and bullets -- no, they're little gifts, containing | | | | Feedback Formula when your son orders you to |
| meanings!" - Philip Roth If you have a demanding | | | | do his bidding. It's simple and goes like this: When |
| child, his words may feel like bullets. Let's find out | | | | you - I feel - I would like you to - Let's fill it in: |
| how to change them into little gifts with meanings. | | | | When you order me to do something, I feel |
| This Social Skill Problem Comes from Bruce: "My | | | | disrespected and won't get what you want. I |
| 11 year-old-son need's to ask for what he wants | | | | would like you to say, "Please" with respect or |
| with respect. It is automatic for him to say, "Dad, | | | | get it yourself. This formula could help your son |
| get me some milk." After such a command, | | | | realize the tone of his words affect both you and |
| conversations like the following takes place: Dad - | | | | others. If his bossiness doesn't work at home, it |
| Sorry can't do it. Son - Why? Dad - Because you | | | | won't work at school or with friends either. Thank |
| have not asked for it properly. Son - | | | | you, Bruce, for sharing this social skills problem. |
| (begrudgingly) May I please have some milk. It | | | | May it help other parents who face bossy kids. |
| happens over and over again." Parenting Advice - | | | | Social Skills Summary: Consider using one or a |
| An Important Principle: Use the least amount of | | | | combination of these social skill tips. The ease of |
| discipline to handle the problem. I like Bruce's | | | | the "parenting stare," the family meeting, and the |
| approach. I can even hear his respectful tone as | | | | feedback formula make them valuable parenting |
| he corrects his son. Unfortunately, it's not quite | | | | tips. The trick is to use them consistently and |
| enough to handle the problem. First Social Skill Tip | | | | never accept disrespect. Why not teach your little |
| for Handling Bossy Kids: Pretend you are Bruce. | | | | general to change his demanding bullets into little |
| Consider using the "parenting stare" while saying | | | | gifts of respect. Respect is a basic social skill to |
| and doing nothing. Make sure it's serious but not | | | | learn at home, in school, and with friends. Respect |
| mean. Stare at your son for several seconds then | | | | builds character too. |
| turn away without getting what he wants. Second | | | | |