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Dealing With Anger

Anger is a tool. Anger is an emotional
response to signal when things go against ourRemind yourself - anger is an emotion like
ideals of how people could be and how theany other. Like fear, love, delight, grief.
world functions. You can't see appallingBut you can learn how to express your anger
things happen and be immune to the feelingsin a constructive way. By learning how to
of anger that will emerge - it's a usefulchannel your anger, you not only stay open
emotion.hearted and loving, you also teach others how
to  manage  their  own  anger.
It's how you react to those situations that
mark you out as someone who understands angerTry something right now. Think back to the
and knows the consequences of letting it getlast person you felt really angry with. Take
out of control. After all, allowing youra  moment  to  remember what made you so mad.
response to become physical, so that you
damage someone in the process of expressingNow imagine yourself in their shoes. Try to
your anger, shows no respect either for yourput in words what you remember them saying
own ability to live from your heart, or forand why they said the things they did, or did
the wellbeing of the person who is on thethe things that you believed started off the
receiving  end  of  it.row. And now imagine yourself back in that
situation, but this time saying that because
Violence and anger is not the same thing andof what has been said or done, you feel
they  do  not  go  hand  in  hand.angry. Own the anger. No blame, no judgments.
No-one can make you angry - it's your
Remember the last time you had a blazing rowemotional response and you can learn to
with someone? Remember how you didn't hearchoose  how  to  respond  in  the  future.
what the other person was saying - you didn't
want to hear and you sure as heck didn'tIsn't it easier to say that you're angry in a
think they might be right. You wanted tocalm and loving way? Isn't it more likely
punish them. You wanted to put up barriersthat, had you used love to deal with the
and withhold friendship and block out whatsituation, you might have connected and found
they  were  saying.a healthy, loving way to resolve the problem?
Remember that we all have is the right to sayYes it's a challenge. But you have such power
how we feel. We all need to be heard, ourand inner strength in you that the further
feelings acknowledged, and to be understood.you go along that journey, you will
If you shout and yell, what chance is thereeventually meet it. Believe that you will.
to  resolve  anything?



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