| A few weeks ago we were returning from a | | | | spaghetti and meatballs ... and a gleaming |
| break in Devon - along with the rest of the | | | | little girl, bursting with pride at her |
| country! A drive that normally takes just | | | | efforts! |
| over 3 hours took nearly 8 hours, and we | | | | |
| crawled through traffic the whole way. I did | | | | So, how did Tilly learn to pull this off? |
| all the driving. It was grey and drizzly for | | | | |
| most of the journey. The story we were | | | | Well, as soon as she could sit in her |
| listening to on CD finished after the first 3 | | | | highchair she would stir, prod, taste and |
| hours, so we listened to a mixture of the | | | | explore (and I would clean it up). |
| radio and my teenage son's ipod instead. I | | | | |
| soon had a headache! | | | | As soon as she could stand she would prop |
| | | | herself up near the sink and splash and spray |
| My husband, impatient on car journeys at the | | | | and scrub and bubble (and I would clean it |
| best of times, was nearly screaming by the | | | | up). |
| end. The kids were tired, grumpy and fed up. | | | | |
| We arrived home in the dark, and had to | | | | When she was old enough to count and measure, |
| unload the car in the pouring rain. When we | | | | she would fill cups with flour and sugar and |
| had brought the last of the bags inside, all | | | | tip it into the mixing bowl, and over the |
| I wanted to do was make a cup of tea, run a | | | | floor, and into her hair, and up her nose |
| hot bubbly bath, take some pain killers, | | | | (and I would clean it up). |
| enjoy some peace and quiet, and then watch a | | | | |
| gentle romcom on television before hitting my | | | | When she had friends round, they would giggle |
| bed - but instead it was time to make supper | | | | and plan and invent and concoct and mix and |
| for us all. I felt like crying. | | | | mingle together a clash of ingredients, |
| | | | opening (and forgetting to close) every box |
| And then my 11 year old daughter came to the | | | | and jar in the kitchen, spilling much on the |
| rescue. | | | | counter and the floor, and generally having a |
| | | | wonderful time (and I would clean it up). |
| "Mummy, you look really tired!" she said. | | | | |
| "Why don't you go and have a bath, and I'll | | | | When she wanted to make her own recipe, I |
| make supper." | | | | would bite my tongue and let her throw |
| | | | together too much flour and too little butter |
| Now, if I'm being honest, my first thought | | | | and one egg too many (and I would clean it |
| was that there was no way she could cope with | | | | up, and mop up her tears of frustration too). |
| making supper entirely by herself. I had no | | | | |
| idea what I was going to cook - we hadn't | | | | When she made her very first cookies, and her |
| stopped to buy anything fresh so I was going | | | | very first cake, and her very first smoothie, |
| to have to dig around in the freezer and | | | | I told everyone about it, and I made sure she |
| larder for inspiration. How could she | | | | heard. And I helped her eat them, too, even |
| possibly manage? Tilly is brilliant at making | | | | the ones that didn't taste very nice! |
| cakes and cookies and other sweet treats, and | | | | |
| often helps us out with lunches and suppers, | | | | When she needed to learn a new technique, I |
| but she had never cooked a main meal entirely | | | | showed her how I do things - but then I stood |
| by herself, with no help. | | | | back and let her choose whether to copy me or |
| | | | find her own way. Sometimes she copied me, |
| I hesitated. Perhaps if I pointed her in the | | | | sometimes she didn't. Sometimes it frustrated |
| right direction, she would manage? But then I | | | | me, but I kept quiet because I didn't want to |
| looked at her face, and I realised that this | | | | frustrate her. |
| was a pivotal moment in our relationship. She | | | | |
| wanted me to trust her and to hand over | | | | So, over the years, I invested a lot of time |
| responsibility entirely, and she also knew, | | | | and effort into my daughter's cooking |
| already, that it was unlikely that I would do | | | | education! How many hours did I spend |
| so. I took the plunge. | | | | cleaning up the kitchen after her? How many |
| | | | times did I groan at the thought of another |
| "Done!" I gave her a hug, and headed upstairs | | | | childish cooking session? |
| for a soak. | | | | |
| | | | But was is worth it? |
| 45 minutes later I came back downstairs to | | | | |
| find a spotless kitchen (all the pans either | | | | Yes, every moment. |
| in the dishwasher or draining), the table | | | | |
| laid, a candle lit, a delicious meal of | | | | I got payback. |